I’ve always thought of myself as a social person. I like people and am generally liked back. But this whole movement of social networking flummoxes me.
I just don’t "get" Facebook and the expression to tweet makes my stomach roil. People texting, especially in moving cars, makes me want to chase them, roll down their windows, and smack them.
Facebook reminds me of Starbucks, making up snobbish words to stand for a server or a cup of coffee – It has to be barrista, grande, oh, really? Your Facebook “wall” and “likes you” and “friends you” are just as nonsensical.
And to tweet every two seconds to say whatever insipid thing comes to mind, why, I ask the heavens why? Who is encouraging you? Who gives a damn?
And texting, those busy little fingers grinding away, endlessly, better you should twiddle your thumbs.
I cry out to the heavens to all those social networkers – get a life! (OMG they think that is a life!)
I miss getting real letters in the mail. Remember real valentines and real love letters?
I miss long and happy phone calls, hearing the voices of friends far away.
I miss being in a room full of live friends, all of us actually seeing, touching, and responding to each other.
Yet, I do use email because that’s all the choice that’s left in business, and because no one writes letters anymore.
And I even skype; what can be cuter than a grandchild waving hi to grandma.
I still won’t kindle, because I love holding pages of a book. And will there even be a book 50 years from now?
Can 500 million people be wrong? Dare I say - yes?
Call me curmudgeon, call me old, call me Luddite, just please don’t "like" me, or text me, or "link" me, or serve me a latte, I beg you.